AVAILABLE NOW!!! The Cary Grant Sanatorium and Playhouse - A disgraced Hollywood starlet, Donna Darling, and two-time German Army deserter, Séamus von Funck, meet in 1942 at an idyllic Ohio home for unwed mothers—or a Nazi abortion slaughterhouse, depending on whom you talk to. Their love endures despite the efforts of a power-hungry congressman, an overzealous religious tabloid, and Donna's Hollywood past. (Psst, it includes Cary Grant.) They prevail despite Séamus being a suspected Nazi spy and America's first prisoner of the second World War—and also the first to escape.

Available now!!

Available now!!
Click to order!

About Me

My photo
Will Tinkham has published six novels: THE CARY GRANT SANATORIUM AND PLAYHOUSE, THE GREAT AMERICAN SCRAPBOOK, THE ADVENTURES OF HANK FENN, BONUS MAN, NO HAPPIER STATE, and ALICE AND HER GRAND BELL. He lives and writes in Minneapolis, MN. His short fiction has been published on three continents and he long ago attended Bread Loaf on a scholarship. An actor of little renown, his credits do include the Guthrie Theater and Theatre in the Round. @WillTinkhamfictionist on Facebook

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

On $9

Delivered a copy of BONUS MAN to Subtext Books to sell on consignment. Received $9 payment for the last book sold, less the $4 I originally paid Amazon for the book and $3.50 bus fare to and from St. Paul, leaving me with $1.50 profit.

Of course, while in St. Paul I had to have lunch with my sister, so I then spent $20 out of my profit at the Eagle Street Grille.

Will have to check with my accountant on just how this will lead to millions. He tells me to be patient.

Wednesday, October 24, 2018

On $20

The following post was doing better than normal on its own, so I decided to pay $20 to "boost" it on Facebook. It went like this: “John Prine and Bill Murray both figure heavily in my novel THE GREAT AMERICAN SCRAPBOOK. My main character snaps out of a breakdown by wandering around playing Prine songs on his girlfriend's guitar. Later Murray, as part-owner of the St. Paul Saints, invites him to sing on Opening Day 2004.” I paired that with a video of an interview and a picture (below) of the two—not sure who the third guy is.

Final return on my investment: 'Reached' 1,928 people, got 98 'clicks', 8 'engagements', 6 'likes' from strangers, 2 new 'friends' on FB, 1 Goodreads 'follower' and sold zero 'books'.

That's what we call marketing.

Tuesday, June 26, 2018

On better failure

Over the last half-year, I've been conducting a failed experiment that will now come to an end. I ventured away from an exclusive Amazon Kindle agreement (see December 2, 2017 post) to sell my novels through other outlets such as B&N and iBooks. I sold exactly ZERO BOOKS through this expanded distribution, while the books I did sell through Kindle garnered a smaller royalty than if I had stayed strictly with Amazon.
According to Samuel Beckett I'm right on course: Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.
Hmmm... Shouldn't it be: "Ever Tried? Ever failed?"

Be that as it may, all six titles are still on Amazon, as well as at Magers & Quinn in Uptown. 

Ask about all six at Subtext Books in St. Paul, even though they currently only carry this one particular title:


Sunday, April 29, 2018


The Miracles, a novel-in-progress and seventh in my Americana series, is moving along slowly—by selfish design. I've discovered that writing novels is far more enjoyable than publishing them, so I'm taking my sweet time and wallowing in this one.

It begins in 1910, features Angela Farmer—the nurse who aided Hank Fenn in an earlier book—and tells how she went from orphan to nurse to nanny for a young Abigail Farnsworth, who had helped deliver quadruplets on a train in yet another novel.

Fortunes turn sour for both young women, so much so that Angela must leave Redding, Connecticut under an assumed name—that of her orphanage friend, schoolmate and fellow nurse Brinda Miracle, who died accidentally on their first day at City Hospital—and lead an orphan train destined for St. Paul, Minnesota.

Orphans not claimed along the route—and thus remaining in the new Brinda's charge—include a 12-year-old Mongoloid, idiot savant (sorry, but more polite terms had not been created by 1910) and pickpocket named Nicholas, an 8-year-old Lizzie Borden fan named Maxine, and 6-year-old Zane with the amber eyes.

Image result for nina cliffordBrinda Miracle and her wards move into an orphanage located between NinaClifford's brothel (pictured) and the Bucket of Blood Saloon (both actual places, the orphanage was not). Real-life historical characters besides Nina include two-term Mayor Laurence “Larry Ho” Hodgson, boxers Mike and Tommy Gibbons, author F. Scott Fitzgerald, and a very young Henry Fonda.

They're a temperamental lot, so it's no wonder I must proceed carefully. To be completed by early 2019.

Sunday, December 31, 2017

On statistics

Facebook just flashed up a memory from New Year's Eve 2014 where I declared that I was going to begin a self-publishing venture (and also predicted that Joe Mauer would contend for another batting title).

In 2015 I sold 105 copies of the three titles published. I published two more in 2016 and totaled an even 100 for all five novels. For whatever reason sales plummeted this year: now six titles combined for a meager 19 books sold. Each book has sold less than the one before—which, I believe, is the opposite of how things are supposed to work.

On the other hand: I'm having a blast writing these books. With everything that could've brought me down in '17, writing has kept me sane and sober. That's your upside to an 81% drop in sales.

And, for the record, Mauer did finish 7th in the league in hitting this year.                                                                                                                                                                    
Happy New Year!!!

Saturday, December 9, 2017

On click bait

What bizarre internet algorithm landed my book cover in “FROM THE WEB “ alongside quick fixes for Swamp Girls with eye bags?

I couldn't resist clicking on it (click bait?!) and was stunned to find this ad occupying the top of this Scribd site touting their $8.99-all-you-can-read buffet.

I paid for no advertising. Does Scribd offer 49¢ worth of free ad time to new books to their site? I doubt it. All I can say is my branching out to seven new ebook outlets, along with this free marketing boost, have amounted to exactly zero (0) new sales.

We keep trying.

Saturday, December 2, 2017

On ebooks

Over the last three years I've published my ebooks exclusively through Amazon Kindle in order to take advantage of their 70% royalty rate for doing so. Problem is I ain't sellin' any through them lately and have decided to expand to multiple vendors such as B&N, iBooks and others displayed in this post.

Today No Happier State is no longer under any exclusive contractual obligation with Kindle and will soon be available through these other outlets (as well as Amazon). The same will happen with The Cary Grant Sanatorium and Playhouse and The Adventures of Hank Fenn later this month, and the other three at the end of January.

Time will tell if this jump-starts my sales. One thing is for sure, your Facebook feeds will be deluged with links to these new outlets and for that I apologize.